I am woman! HEAR ME ROAR!



As I snuggled in to watch the season premiere of one of my favorite shows last week, Suburgatory, I became surprisingly upset as one of the main characters made her first appearance of the season.

Aliie Grant, the young woman who plays Lisa Shay, looked noticeably thinner than previous seasons. God Damnit, I thought, another ally gone. And it’s not that Allie was ever fat, no, now she just looks like she’s decided not to eat between seasons.

Let me take a step back for a moment. As a woman who is constantly worried about her weight and is considered “plus size” in the fashion world (I’m a size 8, thank you very much), I tend to applaud and favor characters that don’t look anorexic in real life. And let’s face it, there aren’t many women in Hollywood who eat cheeseburgers nowadays…if you know what I mean.  Rebel Wilson, Melissa McCarthy, Kirstie Alley, Gabourey Sidibe, I mean, the list is growing shorter by the day. Who can I look at to relate to? And if they were heavier when they started their career, they sure aren’t heavy when they end it. Rebel Wilson has even stated that she’s gotten offers from Weight Watchers to join their program.

So, the real question becomes, why is Hollywood so obsessed with beauty queens? The answer, well, there isn’t just ONE. Last year, I submitted a research paper on women in Hollywood. Unsurprisingly, Hollywood is run by men, and when casting for certain positions, they want young, highly attractive, and thin women to play all of the female roles. Even when it’s a movie or a television series about an older man falling in love with a woman, they want a much younger woman to play his love interest!

Why? It’s because men don’t want to picture themselves having sex with older women, and they don’t want to see it on screen! They want to live out their fantasy and always have this hot, young, object at their fingertips. And if you think I’m wrong, I’d love to send you my paper.

It’s the images in Hollywood that begin to spin the wheel of insecurity for women. And, it’s mostly women who end up with eating disorders. The National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders stated that only 5-15% of individuals with anorexia or bulimia are male!

At the end of the day, I’m just so disgusted with the way men and women criticize others (especially women) about their weight or any sort of weight gain. I’ll give you a prominent example. A few years ago, I decided to change my life for the better and start running, weight lifting, and positively changing my body. It got to the point where I was working out for about 90 minutes to two hours a day 5-6 days a week. I was eating A LOT, but working out for that long also prompted me to lose a lot of weight and gain a lot of muscle. About a year ago, I suffered deeply from Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. It basically became so bad that I didn’t even want to get up in the morning I was so tired. The only exercise I could really do without feeling miserable was yoga. Although yoga is great exercise, it doesn’t exactly provide me with the amount of agility I was used to. So, I ended up losing a lot of the muscle that I gained, and added some of the weight back on.

The point of this story is that during the time in which I was losing the weight and staying thin and muscular, I received SO many compliments from individuals. There wasn’t a day that went by where someone I knew commented on how much I changed, how good I looked, etc. Once some of the weight started to come back on, the compliments stopped. I no longer hear anyone telling me how good I look, or how gorgeous I am. Do I miss it? Sure. But it took more work than what it was worth to keep that body. I’m still trying to maintain good health, but I don’t obsess over the gym aspect of my life anymore.

But, what really needs to happen is a change in the way women view themselves overall. Ladies, please don’t be ashamed of the fact that you ate 5 cookies last night…or every night this week. And please don’t be ashamed of the fact that when you went out with your friends and family, you decided to order that cheeseburger. There is nothing in this world that pisses me off more than predefined gender roles. Women should be able to have that desire to be healthy, but to also eat like a man. And if you’re “man” is disgusted with the fact that you ate just as much as he did last night. Kick his ass to the curb and thank yourself for enjoying that meal!

Granny Smith – over and out

41 thoughts on “I am woman! HEAR ME ROAR!

  1. Great post! So true. Every now and again a new actress will come on the scene who isn’t as skinny as all the rest, she’s not fat either but she has more shape to her and as her career goes on and she gets bigger and bigger fame wise she just gets smaller and smaller waist wise. It’s a shame, because it’s so not how things are in the real world, but because of it both men and women’s standards are too high and not realistic. Men’s standards of the women they’re interested in and women’s standards of themselves.

  2. I would love to read your paper. I find this topic frustrating because I don’t think anyone should be able to define what is or isnt pretty for an entire population. It pits women against each other, judging ourselves against the others and hating both the other woman and ourselves in the end. I am pretty skinny and I always have been, but it’s always been natural (Ice cream is my best friend) and I try (as much as my oreos will let me) to stay healthy. But even having a body that would be considered “normal” in the fashion world (which to the rest of us means skinny) i still get insecure. I don’t like my wrists because they feel like twigs, my legs feel awkward, and I can feel my hip bones. Even having the most amazing fiancee, who loves me for me, it was still hard to come to terms with my body, and it’s still a bit of a struggle, because sometimes being skinny makes me feel like “less of a woman” and there are people who say things like “Men don’t want sticks” and “Real women have curves”. It made me feel like no matter how much Ben said he liked how I looked, he really wanted someone who wasn’t such a twig. I didn’t mean to write this much, and I certainly didn’t mean to whine, this post just struck a chord with me. I just wanted you to know that you’re not alone; I wanted everyone to know that they’re not alone. I think just from reading your blog that you’re an awesome and inspiring woman, and that we should all be proud of the bodies we are in. You can’t make a flower bloom by hating it 🙂

  3. Love this post! Personally, I get a kick out of accenting different body parts depending on what size I happen to be at the moment – almost like changing hair colour with the seasons. Legs and waist when I’m slimmer, and boobs’n’butt when I’ve got a bit more to show off. I told my hubby the other day that I was “going to take my boobs out on the town and show them a good time” before tapering down a little for Spring. I’m all for celebrating whoever we happen to be at the moment – weight, age, and ambitions. ps: shout-out to SarahSaharra’s last line. Let’s bloom, baby!

  4. So, sadly true! I can so relate to your story and now I have a 13 year old daughter to steer in the right, healthy direction – Hollywood does not make it easy! Thanks for the follow – I just love your blog title!

  5. It is heartening, anyway, that there are those who are still calling it. Sometimes it seems that feminism has become so marginalized when so many went through so much to change things. Thanks for following Peachyteachy!

  6. I too was very disturbed seeing Allie Grant on the new season. I hope she can get some help. Thank you for writing about this every so important topic.

  7. Thank you for the follow! Mostly because it allowed me to discover your blog and this post.
    I agree, wholeheartedly! There is far too much pressure on women to forgo nature and to be anything but who we really are. Too thin, too fat, too old….where does it stop? Personally, I love me and I don’t need to look like anyone else. Today at least…..ask me how I feel tomorrow.

  8. I love your blog and this post! As a ‘fluctuating-sized’ woman I think it’s always important to remember that we don’t owe anyone our physical appearance. People often have a ‘look’ that they are comfortable with and when you’re not that they’re not sure how to treat you. However, I do feel that people would respond to the way that we feel about ourselves. So if we’re unapologetic about who we are and what we look like we disarm people of the ability to make us feel bad about ourselves. I think if more and more women (and people in general) start to think “Whatever, I’m hot”, the perception of attractiveness will certainly begin to change.

    It reminds me of a quote that I enjoy by Erin McKean: “You don’t owe prettiness to anyone… Prettiness is not a rent you pay for occupying a space marked ‘female’.”

    I look forward to reading more of your insightful and humorous posts 😉

  9. Every word you have written could be my story & I’m sure, many others who read it… I had gone ten years ago to a gym for a whole year for one hour four days a week and could not face another gym until today & spent another eight years feeling lazy & guilty about that until I decided to finally accept & love myself.
    Thanks for this delightfully realistic post 🙂

  10. I hear you, sister! For years I tried to keep myself a UK size 10-12 as that was the size I arrived in the UK as (I’m originally from Malaysia). But gradually the potatoes and gravy diet won and I became a size 12-14. Still, I was quite happy with that. Had a baby and still managed to get back down to the same size.

    Then in 2010 I arrived in Australia, where the blistering heat caused everything to swell. My feet alone went up 2 sizes. One thing you have to realize about Australia – it’s cheap to live here. If you don’ need to eat or drink, that is!! It’s so darn expensive here, everything is double, triple or even quadruple the price of their European and American counterparts. The only food that’s cheap is fast food. And we know what that does to our bodies. That is why obesity is rampant in Australia, especially in families that are poor. And that is why I am now a size 14-16.

    But I am woman, hear me ROAR!!

  11. Your post reminded me of when I was losing weight, the number of co-workers, some I barely knew, would tell me how wonderful I looked. Always a bit chubby, I too was loving this weight loss and buying new clothes was so much fun now!
    Anyway, the problem was I was losing weight without watching what I ate or exercising. I was extremely ill. I wasn’t told at the time, but later my doctor told me I had 1-2 weeks left at the most!
    I guess my point is, that I had one foot in the grave… but I looked marvelous! The sad thing is that even I bought into it.

    Thanks for stopping by “Not Pretending (to be sane)” and deciding to follow 🙂 I have been enjoying your posts as well.

  12. i am a 29 year old woman who does not give two craps what people think about me. i eat what i want when i want as much as i want. i think i am a size 6 i am 5,4 and 145 pounds which by medical standards means i am over weight which is stupid. luckily my husband is the type to offer me a third or fourth helping instead of complaining, actually he can usually tell if i drop a few pounds and he doesnt like it when i do. i think the way most women in hollywood look now is awful.

  13. Kinda like that thigh gap thing, what da? Who looking at gaps, well… Personally I prefer a woman with a head on her shoulders and a little meat on her bones. Holly is just weird.

  14. Pingback: Zero to Hero – Blogging 101 (Assignment 4): Say Hi to the Neighbours! | Look At The Flowers Lizzie

  15. Thanks for the follow. I love your roar! Looking good should not be analogous to being thin, but it is easy to confuse the two, I agree.

    Look forward to reading more of your insightful posts.



  16. Love this post! Just reminds us women we need to first and foremost love ourselves in whatever skin we’re in. And we all know most men aren’t going to help us do that–except the good ones we snagged as spouses. We need to stick together!

    Keep roaring!

  17. I think your blog will help everyone who’s going through the same thing. I would encourage you to find other blogs who have the same goals only with different twist. You might become a circle friends who can help each other and your readers. Thanks for stopping by. With all the fads and promises out there, I hope you find what fits!!

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